Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
