just come out here and I will go home with you...
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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