where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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