I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
