It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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