So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
