it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
