so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
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The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
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I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face