**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
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