i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
