There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
