omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
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