so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Randomize
