We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
