I want to have your abortion
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Randomize