My first STD was from a foam party
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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