My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
