His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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