forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
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