Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Randomize
