It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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