all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Come share oat with me in your robe
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
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