Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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