Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
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He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
two words...techno handjob
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
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