She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
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Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
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