But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
