so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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