why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
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