I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize