The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Randomize