Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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