he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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