Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Randomize
