i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize