Sponge bath it is.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
FUCK WHALES
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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