We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
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