As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
