Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
