ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Randomize
