Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
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If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
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I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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