R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
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Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
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He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
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