Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize