So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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