And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
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