how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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