I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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