ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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