Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
There's always time for handjobs
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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