My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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