i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
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Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
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You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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